SS's Miscellanous Anime Weakest Link
by Sharpshooter
Summary: hehehe, the third chapter is up, this time for real. hope you like. please r&r!
1. Oh Dear what have we here?

Sharpshooter's Miscellanous Anime Weakest Link  
  
Erin: Hey, Hi, and Howdy Ho everybody! I'm Erin, one of your four hostesses for tonight's edition of Miscellaneous Anime Weakest Link!   
Crash: And if everyone is a good little boy or girl I won't need this. *grins evilly as she hefts a flame thrower*  
Everyone but, Crash, Aurora, Erica, and Erin: *gulps audibly*  
Erica: All right lets get this freakshow running.  
Goku: Hi everyone I'm Son Goku and I still can't find King Kai's Palace. It's fun and all being chased and swallowed by the Snake Lady, but can anyone point me in the right direction?  
Aurora: Dear God not now...  
Zero: Huh?  
Aurora: Shut up*shakes head wearily*  
Vegeta: Are you done already woman?  
Aurora:*sneers, and bows mockingly* The floor is yours Prince Vegeta. Don't call me woman.  
Vegeta: Damn strait woman. I'll call you whatever I please woman. I'm Prince Vegeta of the Saijin race. All bow before me, my spiky yellow hair, and my pink fluffy horsey!  
Goku: Ummm...Vegeta, I have spiky yellow hair too...*points to his now yellow hair*  
Vegeta: Well too bad Kakarott I still have the pink horsey, AND NO ONE WILL EVER TAKE IT AWAY MWUAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!*he's now sitting atop a pink winged horse*  
Erin: Ummm...k....  
Goku: Hmmm...wanna test that?*whips out his hair gell and blond hair dye, then remembers he's a Saijin and transforms. Vegeta does the same. Aurora's eyes flash menacingly over the silence, and suddenly there both back to normal black haired people*  
Goku:*he looks up and see's his hair is normal* Huh?, Hey!, What's the deal here? *try's to get back to Super Saijin, with out success*  
Vegeta: Heh, now you can't steal my horsey!*sticks his nose in the air and tries to transform* WHAT IN THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME KAKAROTT?  
Goku: I didn't do anything. And my name is GOKU not KAKAROTT!  
Crash: You both signed a contract saying that you wouldn't transform, and any power you summon goes to Aurora. If I were you I wouldn't make her mad. *she displayed the two contracts that they both signed before the game started then grinned evilly then walks away before they can examine them further*  
Vegeta: Damn you woman.   
Aurora: I am NOT your woman. You already have one. Now get that sweet ass of yours down in your seat.   
Everyone: *snickers*  
Vegeta: Your asking for it WOMAN! Mabey I should consider building a harem...*he sits down in his seat like a good little puppy while Aurora glares at him*  
Tenchi: You can have mine!  
Erica: If I survive this it'll be a miracle. Crash get the thrower ready.   
Crash: All right capitan*salutes Erica*   
Sakura: Okkk....*looks slightly afraid of everyone else around her, then she perks up* I'm Sakura Avalon and I found a quarter in my ear, a half dollar in my nose, and the 10 year old bag of jelly I found in my pocket was scrum-didly-umptious!   
Spike: Is anyone else grossed out by that?  
Erin: Moving on...  
Kero: I'm Kero Beros guardian of the Clow cards at your service. Ahhhhhhh it's gonna eat me!   
Sakura: What's gonna eat you?  
Kero: THE BOWL OF PUDDING! I JUST SAW IN THE AUDIENCE!*Yugi and Zero look out at the audience, but there's nothing there...*  
Yugi: There's nothing there Kero, only Pegasus and some other freaks.  
From Audience Pegasus: I RESENT THAT!   
Yugi: Too bad Pegasus, we got invited and you got shunned.*shakes head* You should have known letting your affair with Joey be public was a bad idea!   
Pegasus: Well I can't help it if he's got such a great bod!  
Everyone:*shudders*  
Kero: Where are we again?  
Zero: I'm Raye Enna but you can call me Zero cause I'm a loser! Wait a minute what's my name again? I thought it was Raye...why does everyone call me Zero then?*begins to mutter something about his mommy and Raye and other people*  
Erica:^_^;  
Kizuna: Hi my name is Kizuna and I have cat ears! I don't know why exactly, I woke up one day and there they were sticking out of my head. I wonder if I'll grow a tail...*begin's to wander around the room muttering about cats*  
Erin: ^_^;;  
Tenchi: I'm Tenchi Masaki somebody please help me get away from these women! Help, I'll do anything to get away from them just GET ME OUTTA HERE!  
From Audience: Tenchi! Come back! We miss you! *Tsasami, Mihoshi, Washu, and Ayeka are all waving frantically at him and Ryoko.*   
Kizuna: Meooow?  
Ryoko: I'm the space pirate Ryoko and livin' with Tenchi has made me realize how gay he really is. I mean come on! How many times has he walked in on any of us and not taken advantage of us? I mean look at this!*displays her sizable rack* See what I mean! He turns away as if it were something bad or disgusting!*Tenchi was looking around frantically for an exit*  
Tenchi: I am not gay!   
Ryoko: Yes dear, you are. How many times have I given you chances? At least 30 today or so and still you turn away. I bet you think the skanky Pegasus is cute too!   
Tenchi: Well now that you mention it...  
Ryoko: I knew it I knew it!*she gets up and stalks out of the room*  
Tenchi: I dunno*shrugs*  
Crash: Ughhhhhh...how can you think that guy's cute?   
Tenchi: *blushing* Well he's got pretty hair and all...  
Vegeta: *muttering*What a pansy...  
Zero:*blinking a few times* No kidding  
Kero:Where are we?   
Yugi: I'm Yugi Mutoh and this is Yami, my special friend.*smiles non-challant*  
From Audience Joey: PANSEY! Tenchi I'm warning you now! Stay away form my Pegasus!   
Yami: I have to agree. I mean who can be that short and talk that mush and not be one?  
Tenchi: You go girl!  
Aurora: SHUT UP!*Everybody gets extremely quiet.* Spike you may continue.  
Spike: Spike Speigel's the name, bounty huntin's the game. I faked my own death once, and I can do it again, this time without losing an eye!  
Crash: Ummmm......k.....  
Spike: What?  
Crash: Well....I thought you were taller.  
Spike: What are you talking about? I'm tall!  
Crash: No you're not. I'm taller than you are.   
Spike: Whatever. At least I'm taller than fruit boy over there.*points to Yugi who's dancing the macerena with Kero in a fruit hat*  
Erica, Crash, and Aurora: Oooooooooookkkkkkkkk......  
Erin: Oooooooooooohhhhhhhhh...how cute!  
Erica: Are you the retarded personality or something?  
Crash and Aurora: I do believe so.  
Erin: Humph   
Everbody:*snickers*   
Vegeta: I demand you get me off this freakshow! Me and Pretty Pony have things to do!  
Aurora: I'm doing the God damn best I can! And I am not your WOMAN! Now sit back down back in your chair And WaIt FOR THE QUESTIONS!!!   
Everyone: *flinches, 'cept Aurora*  
Zero: *whispering to Erin* Is she always like that?  
Erin: Sadly yes, pretty much. Alrighty then if you'll set the clock we'll begin!  
Erica: Goku, how do you spell your name?  
Goku: Ummmm...G-O-U-K-O-U?  
Erin: Dear God that's incorrect. How could you not know how to spell your own name?*Link-0* The correct answer is G-O-K-U nitwit.   
Crash: Sakura, what begins with semi and ends with truck?  
Sakura: Ummm...Sesame Street?  
Crash: No, the correct answer was Semi Truck*link-0*   
Sakura: Ooooo I thought you said what begins with Sesame and pollutes the minds of young children with corrupt images of violence and nudity!   
Erin: Oooo.....kkkkk..... *Link-0*  
Erin: Zero whats the authors favorite anime?  
Zero: She doesn't have one!  
Erica: That's correct. *link-50* Other answer's include 'Ahhhhhhhhh the Pudding is going to eat me!' and 'duuuuuuuuuuhhhh...where am I?'  
Bowl of Pudding: *From Audience* I resent that! I only want Kero!  
Kero: I TOLD YOU IT WAS REAL!   
Vegeta: *snickers*  
Aurora: What? Ok, your question is why does Crash have to break everything she see's?  
Vegeta: Hmmmmmmmm....*stares off into space*  
Erin: Ummm...k...We'll get back to you on that one  
Kero: BANK!   
Crash: it's not even your turn!   
Kero: *stares blankly at her* Where are we?   
Vegeta: Ohhhh..that tickeles!* the little conscious angel devil things are sitting on his shoulders*   
Bad Vegeta: How come we never blow up people any more?  
Good Vegeta: Because Bulma won't let him! You should thank her for that!*playfully tugs at one of Vegeta's black locks and blows in his ear.*  
Vegeta: Ohhh that tickles...wait a sec! Stop it get off my shoulders'!*tries to brush them off with out success*   
Erica: Did you forget to take a medicine or something?  
Vegeta: No baka, this is normal! Stop it*the good one stuck a finger in his ear* go pester those women!   
Aurora and Erica: We are NOT your WOMEN!   
Aurora: Your WOMAN is standing out in the audience with smoke pouring out of her ears!   
Bulma: From Audience: Vegeta! We already went through this part of your re-hab! You told me you were done picking up corner sluts!   
Erin, Erica, Crash, and Aurora: *gasp of rage* HOW DARE YOU! WE ARE NOT SLUTS YOU SKANKY WHORE!   
Aurora: Guards! Take her away! *Gene Starwind and Tori Avalon walk in and drag her away, with her kicking and screaming all the way. Gene pops back in for a moment*  
Gene: Anything else ma'am?  
Erin: NO! Now go away.   
Vegeta: *sigh* Oh dear now you've done it. *glares at Aurora* If she's hurt you'll pay WOMAN!   
Aurora: That's it! Stop the clock.*link-50, 2min, 10 sec.*  
Everyone except Aurora and Vegeta:*flinches*  
Aurora:*continues* Why don't you try this woman ...*pulls out a fork* en gaurd!   
Vegeta: Bring it on bitch! *pulls out a spoon*  
Aurora: Oh it has already been ba-rought! *Aurora and Vegeta begin to fight*  
Erin: Ummmm...k...  
Crash: Whatever. Start the clock. Kero what is this?*holds up a pine cone*  
Kero: A bowl of pudding?   
Bowl of Pudding: You loser I'm out here!   
Kero: Ahhhhhh I TOLD YOU IT WAS REAL! IT'S GONNA EAT ME!   
BoP: Damn strait I'm gonna. *the pudding floats onto stage and begins to chase Kero through the studio. Aurora and Vegeta are now river danceing over the stage*  
Erica: Kamia sama...*link-0*  
Yami: You said it.  
Erin: Kizuna   
Kizuna: Meow?   
Erica: *shakes head* Why in hell did I want to do this again? This is beyond messed up now. Why the hell doesn't Kero just eat the pudding?   
Kizuna: Meow. Meow meow, meow meow meow. Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow.   
Crash: Alright...That is....errrr.....correct.*link-50* Other answers include 'Nani? I have no clue as to where I am and what or who is a Kero?' Also 'I'm really really horney and that pudding looks scrumptious.' would have worked.   
Stan: Is this studio 6?  
Erica: No. What the hell are you doing here?  
Cartman: Shut your god damned mouth you whore!  
Erica: Shut up fat ass.  
Cartman: Hey! I am not fat! I'm just big boned. Jesus Christ what the hell is that?*points to where Vegeta and Aurora are now fighting*   
Zero: Aurora and Vegeta are fighting again.   
Crash: Stop the clock *1.50* dear god almost two minutes left?!   
Spike: Hit the deck!*Vegeta let out a barage of Ki blasts and everyone but Kenny falls to the floor.*  
Stan: Oh my god you killed Kenny!   
Kyle: You bastards!*Vegeta turns and flicks everyone off then turns back to block a new barrage of kicks and punches.*  
Goku: Hey! Vegeta! I thought we were supposed to fight!   
Vegeta: Not...Now....Kakarott...the author MUST HAVE...changed..HER...mind.  
Goku: My name is SON GOKU!, not KAKAROTT! *starts to sob* why can't you just understand that?*Vegeta blew up a wall and blasted a few more Ki blasts at Aurora before turning to look at Goku*  
Vegeta: I'll call you whatever I please you low born ninny! *Aurora darts in and kicks him in the balls hard enough so that everyone heard the thunk of her foot connecting with the ermmm...flesh. He sank slowly to his seat.*  
Aurora: *panting* That's better..now where were we? Ah yes*she slid back into her own seat* All right start the clock. Spike what do you get when you cross a girl pig with a guy monkey?  
Spike: Ouch...ummm... a pig monkey?   
Aurora: What gender? a) femal, or b) male?  
Spike: c) it!   
Crash: That's correct *link-150* Since it was technically two questions i'll give you 50 more dollars.   
Erica: Tenchi where are the only, openeings in the human body?  
Tenchi: Ummm...your mouth*fingeres his lip while staring seductively at Pegasus*your eyes*flutteres them a him too* and your ass!*he smacked his to prove the point.*  
Pegasus: I'll be seeing you after the show*eyebrow wiggle*  
Everyone: *Shudder*  
Mihoshi, Tsasami, Ayeka, and Washu: Oh no you won't!   
Mihoshi: We've got our own plans...  
Washu: *to Ayeka* I invented the de-gay spray. One spritz, or in his case we might need a whole bottle, of this stuff and he goes strait from now on!   
Ayeka: Excelent...  
Crash: Scarily that is correct*coughs*homo*coughs* *link-200*Kero, give me one reason not to test my flamthrower on you.  
Kero: HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! THE PUDDING IS GOING TO AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Crash: Well I guess that solves that question *link-250*Yami...  
Yugi:... and this little piggy went wee wee wee wee all the way home! wanna do it again?   
Sakura: All right!  
Crash: *shakeing head* I don't think I can take anymore of this.   
Erin:*smileing cheerfully*Momentai! We'll get through this! I mean we're all from the same--  
Yami: You're takeing up time! C'mon, get to the questions!   
Erica: We'll get back to you on that one. We stil have to think of some.   
Yami: WELL HURRY UP! I CAN'T BE EXPECTED TO SIT HERE ALL DAY! I HAVE TO GO DOWNLOAD SOME MORE SCRAMBLED PORN AND MAKE SWEET LOVE TO--  
Aurora: That's all right, we don't need to know. *muttering to Goku*v though I wouldn't be supurised if it was that slut Mai.  
Goku: I wouldn't doubt it.   
Yami: What was that?   
Erin: Never mind. Here's your question. What does1+56-98/22+98+78+54-96+36*85+14-4-4-58+25+87*-89+23-98+78/4*8=?   
Yami: HOW IN HEL AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW????  
Aurora: That is correct! There is no answer so that one will have to do!   
Erica: Actually she just REALLY sucks at math and doesn't want to take the time to figure it out.  
Aurora: Hey! That is not fair! You're even worse at it than I am!  
Erica: I never said I wasn't! Yugi!   
Yugi: Nan? BANK! Why are there 4 hostesses instead of just one?   
Erin: Aren't we the ones who're supposed to be asking questions?   
Yami: Well there are four of you...why do we need so many people to do what just one person is probably capeable of?  
Erin and Crash:*blinking rapidly several times*  
Erica: Well, technically there really only is--  
THE DUMDUM DUM DUM MUSIC PLAYS  
Erica: Thank you God I swear I will never swear again!   
Crash:....*snicker*All right now vote.  
Goku: The pudding!  
Vegeta: Aurora!   
Sakura: The hair gell!  
Kero:from inside pudding THE PUDING!  
Zero: Vegeta!   
Vegeta: *glares at him hard enough to make Zero squirm*  
Zero: NO! I change my vote to Tenchi!   
Kizuna: The pudding!  
Yugi: Kero!   
Yami: Tenchi!   
Tenchi: Ryoko!  
Ryoko: Tenchi! How dare you! Pegasus!*pop's back into seat*   
Spike: Tenchi!   
Erin: Ok...Goku why the pudding?  
Goku: I want the pudding, it looks yummy!   
Aurora: You can't pick me Vegeta*pouts* pick someone else...or I'll tell...  
Vegeta: Myself!*groans and clutches his balls*  
Erica: Sakura change your vote.   
Sakura: Oh all right...Tenchi! He's got to be the biggest homo I've ever seen! *she's still playing with Yugi's toes...*   
Crash: Everyone who voted for the pudding vote for someone else!  
Goku: Tenchi!   
Kero: Tenchi!   
Kizuna: Tenchi!   
Aurora: Why yourself Veggie-Weggie?*now smiling brilliantly and seductively*   
Vegeta: *moans again*DON'T CALL ME THAT WOMAN!  
Aurora: *batting eyes* You call me Woman...Why can't I call you Veggie-Weggie?  
Vegeta: I call all women Woman!   
Aurora: *now pouting*Well I thought that if you got to call me a new name then I could too!   
Vegeta: No! You are not my Woman! As you pointed out before my Woman is out in the audience with smoke pouring out of her ears!   
Aurora: Oh poo, well if your sure...*still pouting and trying to win him over. (sigh)*Since I don't feel like asking why you picked them the practically unanimous vote for Tenchi wins! Tenchi get your gay ass out of my studio before you infect every one with your homo germs!   
Tune in next time for the next round of Miscellaneous Anime Weakest Link!   
  
Backstage: Tenchi: Finally! Now I can go after that sweet assed Pegasus! *Tenchi's gang of women gang up behind him and strap him to a board.*   
Ayeka: Now we can have our way with him! *Tenchi's scream's echo all throughout the studio.*  
  
Will Aurora win over Vegeta? Will Vegeta stop calling everyone Woman? Will Kero ever get out of the pudding? Will Sakura ever stop playing with Yugi's toes? Find out whenever I get around to writing a new chapter!   
  
disclaimer: oh ya and I don't own any of these characters no matter how much I wish I do blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda... 


	2. Pudding Monster's and Pyro the Chic who ...

Sharpshooter's Miscellaneous Anime Weakest Link Round Two  
  
Last time on Miscellaneous Anime Weakest Link Tenchi Masaki was voted off. Since I finally decided to stop being such a slacker, this is the result. I hope you like it, but I feel truly bad for anyone who likes to read anything that I've written since I myself know it's all shit. WELCOME TO SHARPSHOOTER'S MISCELLANEOUS ANIME WEAKEST LINK, ROUND TWO!!!  
  
Erin: Hey! Hullo! Hi Hi! Welcome to SS's Miscellaneous Anime Weakest Link! I'm one of your four hostesses--  
Pyro: Five!   
Aurora, Erin, and Erica: Who the hell are you?  
Crash: She's my really distant cousin on my mother's father's father's aunt's sister's mother's daughter's brother's side. She gets me into trouble every time she comes to visit.(grumpily)  
Pyro: Do not!   
Crash: The last time you came around you accidentally lit great great gramma's extra oxygen tank on fire...and everyone thought that I did it! I got grounded for two months! AND I DIDN'T EVEN DO IT FOR ONCE!   
Pyro: Ah cheer up.   
Yugi: What kind of name is that?  
Pyro: What kind of name is Yugi?  
Yami Yugi: Touché` Yugi what the hell are you doing! Stop it you're embarrassing me! (Yugi has dyed himself green, skin and hair all, and is dressed in all green. a small star adorns the top point of his hair. he's covered in Christmas lights and was just about to plug himself in. he shrugs and does anyway, despite Yami Yugi's apparent discomfort. the lights wink cheerily as he puts his hands out and begins to twirl on one foot.)  
Sakura, Goku, and Zero: (singing) O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree! How Lovely--(Pyro sneaks up behind him and lights him on fire.)  
Aurora: IT'S NOWHERE NEAR CHRISTMAS!   
Spike: Apparently it is now.  
Erin: NO NO NO!!!(Yugi has just realized he's on fire and runs forward only to be yanked back by the Christmas light cord, still pluged into the wall.)  
Sakura, Goku, and Zero:(change their lyrics to) O Burning Yugi, O Burning Yugi! How pretty your hair burns with the help of matches!   
All but Yugi:(laugh hysterically till Yugi almost blows up in a great big fireball. thankfully for Yugi the BoP comes over and douses him with a cool stream of gooey chocolate pudding, along with Kero)  
Kero: YAHOO! FREEDOM! FREEDOM! I'M FREE!!! O thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you--  
Erica: That's quite enough.  
Crash: How'd he start burning?(looking suspiciously at Pyro)  
Pyro: Why are you looking at me?(all innocence)  
Erin: Haven't you ever heard that 99.99999999999999999999999999% of Christmas tree fires start because of faulty Christmas tree lights?  
Crash: Ya but--  
Erica: Well there you go.   
Crash: Still...(continues to stare at Pyro)  
Pyro: What did I do?(still completely oblivious and innocent)  
Crash: I'm watching you.  
Aurora: (to other hostesses) What's with her?  
Erica: Remember we said she could be a hostess if she paid attention for a week? Well, I think she's gone into withdrawal.  
Erin: That would explain it.  
Crash: Huh?  
Pyro, Aurora, Erica, and Erin: Never mind!   
Aurora: All right then , Yugi go get hosed off and get medical attention, the smell is driving me nuts.   
Erica: Till you're healed don't come back, I don't like the smell of burnt pudding either.   
Erin: Bye bye for now! (cheery and all smiles as Yugi skulks off, still smoldering)  
Pyro: Can we start now?  
Crash: Well to bad if we can't, I...I can't take it this kinda a pressure! (starts to twitch)  
Aurora: Erin, you pick.  
Erin: Why don't you?  
Aurora: Cause I don't want to go through the headache of trying to pick one of these loser's.(motion's to everyone but Vegeta, who she winks at, and blows a kiss)  
Vegeta: (big shudder) STOP WINKING AT ME WOMAN!  
Erin: Oh. I'm confused now so I'm gonna start over.  
All but Erin:(fall over)  
Ryoko: How could you be confused?  
Erin: Heh...I ...uh...Welcome to SS's Anime Weakest Link. I'm one of your four--  
Pyro: FIVE!   
Erin: Five hostesses on tonight's version of SS's Anime Weakest Link!   
Everyone but Erin: (falls over again, with un-controllable twitches)  
Erin: What's wrong with you guys?  
Yami Yugi: Good God if she borrowed a piece of brain just figuring out what it was would kill her!   
Crash: She's worse than me! Is that possible?  
Aurora: I never dreamed it but, apparently yes, there is someone out there who's worse than you and Hydra-chan combined!  
Pyro: (playing with a candle, accidentally gets to close and singes her eyebrows) NO, no ones worse than Hydra-chan, she doesn't even need Crash's help.  
Vegeta: Look who's talking wench.  
Pyro: Hey! What'd I do?  
Ryoko: What haven't you done?  
Pyro: Umm...now that I come to think of it--  
Goku: Thinking? What's that?  
Aurora: Nothing you would know how to do. Now, let's move on before I make things ugly.   
Erica: Is it just me, or does it seem like the worlds ending?  
Crash: It's not just you...I can't take it!! I can't take it!   
Erin: Shush. Last round you managed to bank umm..well...not very much and now you have even less time to try and get even more money than you got last time.  
Pyro: Money burns well.  
Spike and Ryoko: WHAT?!!?!?!?!?!  
Pyro: Well they gave me this briefcase of money for doing this and I couldn't find anything worth burning at the store so I tossed some lighter fluid on tossed on a lit match and danced through and around the burning brief case. I t went up like a pretty roman candle.  
Spike and Ryoko: (exasperated and incredulous)  
Ryoko: How could you do such a thing?  
Pyro: (blinking) Do what?  
Spike: You could have given it to me!   
Ryoko: Or me!   
Pyro: Do you like to burn things too? I have some illegal...err....legal..ya that's right legal...fireworks in my garage we can light off if you want.   
Ryoko: Burning things is all well and good and all but burning money is a completely different story.   
Spike: Doesn't matter anymore, doesn't matter doesn't matter doesn't matter.(sulkily)  
Ryoko: How bout next time you give us the money hmmm?  
Pyro: Okey dokey!(lights firework pulled from pretty much nowhere; it whizzes around the studio and eventually runs into Vegeta's hair. the smushed fire work then falls to the floor where Goku then picks up the still sparking firework and eats it. He burps a small cloud of sulfur smelling gas and takes his seat again, with a white smoke drifting from his ears[for those of you who do not get what I just said the fireworks ran into Vegeta's hair, which didn't even get dented, and then fell to the floor where Goku ate it and began smoking from the ears] )  
Goku: Mmmm..that'sa spicy meat-a-ball.  
Aurora, Crash, Erin, and Erica: (fall over and begin twitching)  
Pyro: You shouldn't have done that. They're poisonous. I had one once while I was trapped in a studio once and I burped and smoke came out my nose then everyone else in the room fainted and lost control of their bladders. The smell was so nasty that I lit their pants on fire to try and get rid of it, but it just lit their pats on fire and woke them all up. Anyway, they took off their pants with excited screams and a few shouts and flung them at the walls, which was not a--  
Kizuna: Meow meow meow meow meow meow? {Does this story have a point?}  
Pyro: Of course it does!   
Kero: Where are we?  
Crash: I don't know, though I wish it were someplace away from these freaks. (gets up and walks to the snack bar and gets a glass of cherry punch, but on the way back she trips and not only lands in the BoP, but she also shorts a few circuits when she spills the juice.)  
BoP: Hey watch where you're going!   
Pudding Monster Crash(PMC): Sorry.  
Pyro: (While Crash is getting juice) Anyway they woke up to--  
Goku: You already told us that part!   
Pyro: Shut up! Now where was I? Oh ya, they threw their pants into a pile on top of my lighter fluid and fireworks and the whole frelling place went up, BOOM! And in the middle of it all this really really really bright light appeared and said 'I AM THE GOD OF AIR CONDITIONING, and on the side I also fill in for the Goddess of Fire but anyway, I CAME TO TELL YOU TO KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, YOU'VE BEEN DOING A GREAT JOB.' and I was all 'you came here to tell me that?' and he was 'ya pretty much. keep on a burning!' and I was all 'dude!' so I lit him on fire too. He screamed like a guy.  
Sakura: Wasn't he a guy?  
Pyro: Oh...., ya he was!   
Erica: I tohught you said this story had a point.  
Pyro: O....I did?  
Aurora, Erica, and Erin: (shaking heads)  
Aurora: God if you please would strike me down where I stand it would be most appreciated.(big thunder blot reaches down and frys Aurora)  
Aurora: Owwww...(falls over in a pile of dust)  
Vegeta: I never believed in you till now, but I THANK YOU!!!!! (smoothes out his ballgown and kicks the hairdresser in the balls as he tries to put another bow in Vegeta's hair.)  
Erin: Dude! Where'd you get that dress?  
Vegeta: (suddenly crying) SHE MADE ME WEAR IT!!!!!T_T T_T T_T  
Ryoko: Awww cheer up!  
Yami Yugi: Can't we get on with it???  
Erica: With what?(Pyro sweeps up Aurora's ashes and puts them into a tiny vase)  
Pyro: Prettiful...now all we need is a little...(to Erica: whisper whisper)and a little...(whisper whisper) and BOOM! PRESTO!   
Spike: C'mon c'mon! Hurry up! I have to go watch my soaps in an hour!   
Erin: Ooooo...damnit hurry up! I must not miss this one!   
Pyro: They're scareing me.   
Erica: They scare everyone.   
PMC: What's going on? Good greif i was only gone fro like five minutes!   
Kero: AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! THE PUDDING MONSTER IS GONNA EAT ME!!!!!!!!(he flys to the ceiling and crawls on top of one of the lights fixtures)  
PMC: KERO!!!!! (puts palms together and blsats off to the ceiling on a cool stream of pudding where she snatches Kero from his perch and stuffs him into her mouth) Mmmm...tastes like chicken.  
Kero:(from inside PMC) I RESENT THAT!!!!!  
Goku: Awwwww....I wish I could make pudding stream from my hands.(sulks in a corner while munching on a lowfat tofu/soy wheat germ bar) DAMN YOU CHICHI AND YOUR ACCURSED DIETS!!!!   
Vegeta: Since when did you get so smart usuing big words like that Kakarott?(put's his glass slippers on, and poofs his hair)  
Goku: Hooked on Phonics. ^_^  
MEANWHILE  
PMC:(has blasted a hole through the roof, but unfortunately it's raining outside so when she pulls herself through the hole--) I'M MELTING!!!!! I'M MELTING!!!!!(big globs of pudding rain down on everyone in the studio)  
All except Vegeta: EWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Kero: I'M FREE I'M FREE!!! I'M FREE I'M FREE I'M FREE I'M FR--(the BoP has snuck up behind him and--)  
BoP: Tastes just as good the second time down. Mmmmm...Kentucky Fried Kero.   
Ryoko: We aren't ever gonna get out of here are we?  
Erica: Nope. If we're lucky maby God'll strike us down too.  
Zero: Oh yay.  
Pyro: SHIT!!! WE DON'T HAVE ANY TIME LEFT!!!!  
Erin: Oh dear. What's gonna happen to Aurora and Crash?  
  
TUNE IN NEXT TIME!!! WILL Vegeta ever get to the Ball in time? Will Pyro ever finish her project with Erica? And what will become of the refrigerated turtles? Will Chichi let Goku eat normal food?  
FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON SHARPSHOOTER'S MISCELLANEOUS ANIME WEAKEST LINK!!!!!!! 


	3. oh fuck. and squabbles fromt he cast and...

Sharpshooter's Miscellanous Anime Weakest Link   
Oh fuck! And yes, this chapter will be very perverted.  
  
Erin: Welcome to SS's Misc. Anime Weakesst Link.*sighs* I'm one of your *counts remaining hostesses* three left over hostesses.   
Goku: Mmmmm....cupcake!   
Erica: Shut up! We are not cupcakes!   
Goku: Where?! *runs around in a circle till he get's too dizzy and fals over barking like a dog*  
Pyro: Keep it down! Can't you see I'm working!?* leans over a table with a small jar on it. pours a red liquid inside the smal jar and it begins to smoke. roses pour out of the small openeing. bows as ever one claps and cheers.* And for my next trick I shall make a woman appear! *walks around to the other side of the table swirling her big red cape as she goes. the vase of ashes on a small table appears as the cape settels around her shoulders once more. she pours some more red liquid into the vase, followed by something sparkly, one of the roses, and an eye of some sort.* Heh, hmmm.....If I could have one of these lovely volunteer's come up....ummm...Vegeta get your ass up here. Good puppy!*pats him on one of his spikes(of hair)and cuts her palm in the process.* Oppsss..oh well*Pours a little of the blood into the vase then grimaces.*Damn! What do you use on your hair??  
Vegeta: Mr. Kevin's Hair Gell along with my own brand of hair products.*smirks as he poofs his hair, then begins tapping his glass slippered foot)  
Pyro: Whatever. And now to make the woman appear! *a small ball of fire appears in her hand and she quickly dumps it into the vase then covers it with her cape* ALright now, hang onto your underware boys and girls here we--  
Goku: WAIT A MINUTE!!!!   
Erica: WHat now?  
Goku: What if you don't have any underware on?  
Pyro: You what? Well then hold onto your pants then.  
Goku: Well what if you don't have any pants on?  
Pyro: Well you have to oh, dear.   
Vegeta: Point that thing somewhere else!   
Spike: NO THE OTHER WAY!!!!  
Pegasus(from audience): Ohhh! Why you're even better looking than Joey!   
Joey: HEY!!! Why I otta!*begins doing something to Pegasus*  
Pegasus: *screams like a guy* Ooooo that tickels! hehehehe do that again!   
EVeryone: O.o...-_-;;; EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Pyro: Well here, put these on then, I'm sure though that I'm not the only permanently scarred.  
Everyone but Goku: *raises hand*  
Pyro: Well moving on then. Enie Meeny Miney moe, Larry, Harry, Mary and Moe! Beans Beans the magical fruit, the more you eat, the more chance you have of being a tomato. Abera Kadebra and monkey monkey!!! *the vase shakes and glows a violent shade of scarlet, then burst into peices* IT'S ALIVE IT'S ALIVE!!!! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!*the insane laughter continues till the cape is lifted and Aurora pokes her head out.*  
Aurora: Will you please shut up? You're driveing me insane! NOt that I'm not already insane, BUT MORE SO!   
Vegeta: Eppp!!!   
Pyro: IT'S ALIVE!! IT'S ALIVE!!!   
Aurora: *sneaks up behind Pyro and whacks her on the back of her head.* There. Now where were we? Oh yes. Where'd Crash go?  
Crash: I'm right here!*from big brown puddle on the floor*   
Erica: We didn't think to try to put her back together.   
Pyro: You didn't. I did! *Tosses on napalm and a few firecrackers, then lights it all.*   
Crash: YOU DUMBASS!!!!!! AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!   
Pyro: Oppsss....^_^;;   
BoP: You idiots. You can't bring the Pudding Monster back to life like that! You have to do it like this!*Sprays whip cream all over the puddle and then--* KEROBEROS!!!!!!!   
KeroBeros: YAH YAH YAH!! WHERE WHERE WHERE!! WHERE IS IT!!!! C'MON TELL ME PLEASE PLEASE!! YAH YAH YAH! MMMM..YUMMY PLEASE?? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!?!?!!?!?!?!!?!?!?!!  
BoP: There. Eat.   
Keroberos: YUMMY!!!!!!!!!!*slurps down the pudding puddle.* Wa!? Whoa! AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*Keroberos explodes and Crash dusts herself off*  
Crash: Well that's better. Are we done with the second round?   
Erica: Ya.  
Crash: Oh well. *shrugs* Oooo what's that?*picks up Pyro's small urn and accidently drops it. the sound of breaking china echo's through the small studio.* Opppssss...  
Pyro: WHY YOU LITTLE! THAT WAS MY FAVORITE, not to mention most epensive, VASE! YOU BETTER PAY FOR A NEW ONE!   
Crash: Heh heh O.O...^_^;  
Pyro: Grrrrrrrrrr....  
Crash: Heh heh...  
Aurora: Anyway...  
Erica: *stareing at Crash* UH right...Last round we did absolutely nothing!  
Erin: So Round three will be the same as round two right?  
Crash: NO! I don't want to be the PM again!  
Aurora: And being hit by lightning sucks.  
Erin: NO!!! That's not what I meant!   
Pyro: Well what did you mean then?  
Erin: I DON'T KNOW!!!   
Spike: You people are insane.  
Erin, Erica, Pyro, Crash, and Aurora: WE KNOW THAT ALREADY!!!   
Spike: O.o  
Pyro: Oh foget it.  
Crash: Ok...since we did nothing last round then we'll start over again!   
ALL: NOOOOOOOO!!!!  
Crash: What I meant is that we can actually START this round over again.  
Erin: WE NEVER EVEN STARTED THE LAST ROUND!!   
Crash: I KNOW!   
Erin: THEN WHAT ARE TRYING TO SAY??  
Erica: SHUT UP BOTH OF YOU! WE AREN'T EVEN GFONNA BE ABLE TO START THIS ROUND IF YOU KEEP GOING LIKE YOU ARE!!!!   
Erin and Crash: *cringe*  
Aurora: I think she's been hanging around me to much.   
Kizuna: MeOW!(No kidding!)  
Yami: You said it.  
Sakura: Sheesh.  
Kero: Where are we?  
Ryoko: HO Shit!   
Spike: *sulking* My soap...  
Zero: Do you want mine?  
Spike: NOT THAT YOU BAKA!   
Zero: *shrug* It's not like I ever use it.   
Sakura: No.. Really?*sarcastically. swats a fly away from her face*  
Vegeta: Humph. Can't you take you're mind off--  
Aurora, Erin, Erica, Pyro, and Crash: SHUT UP!   
All contestants: WHY SHOULD WE??? YOU NEVER SHUT UP!   
Hostesses: THAT'S BECAUSE WE ARE GODS! WE HAVE THE RIGHT TO TALK OR NOT!!!!   
AC: SO WHAT???  
H: WE RULE ALL! NOW BE QUIET AND SIT DOWN!!!  
AC: NO!   
H: YES!   
Producer: Ahem.  
AC: NO!   
H: YES!   
Producer: Excuse me!   
AC: NO!   
H: YES!   
AC: NO!   
Producer: GOD DAMNIT SHUT UP ALL OF YOU! YOU WILL ALL GET ON WITH THIS FUCKING SHOW SO I CAN GO HOME!!!! The sooner we get done with this show, the sooner you can all go your own ways.   
Tenchi:*hopping down audience asile with the board strapped to his back and the TM gang on his heals*AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SOMEONE SAVE ME FROM THESE WOMEN!!!!!!!  
Washu: HOW*PANT PANT* COME THE *PANT PANT* DE-GAY SPRAY HASN'T *PANT PANT* WORKED??? IT'S WORKED ON EVERYONE ELSE!!!!!!!*they run around the studioonce,twice, three times--*  
H: YES!   
AC: NO!   
Ayeka: TENCHI! PLEASE COME BAC TENCHI!!!!!!!!  
Producer: *twitch twitch*  
H: YES!   
AC: NO!   
Washu: HERE!!!! *fills room with de-gay spray*  
Producer: *twitch twitch*  
H: YES!   
AC: NO!  
Tenchi: AGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   
Pegasus: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*Shrivels up and makes a loud popping noise*  
All: That's it?   
Aurora: I thought there would have been an explosion or something better...  
Erica: I know whatcha mean  
Crash: Just POP! and gone? What kinda exit is that?  
Spike: MY SOAP OPERA!!!  
Zero: Awwwww shut up ya pansey.   
Spike:*whimper*  
Kizuna: Meow meow meow--(I want chicken--)  
Producer: I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU!!!!!!!! EITHER YOU SHUT UP AND G ET ON WITH THIS OR I'LL SICK THE GUARDS ON ALL YOUR ASSES!!!!!!!!!*a LOT menacing guards flank him, eyes glowing*  
All but Vegeta and Aurora: *gulp*  
Everyone: *sullenly* Alright...  
Producer: See ya later! *Producer and guards vanish*  
Erica: Well that was messed up.   
Ryoko: Let's just forget about just happened k?  
Everyone: Right.  
Aurora: Alright everyone let's begin round two!   
Everyone but Aurora: THAT WAS LAST ROUND!   
Aurora: ^_^;; Sorry, I mean let's begin round three!   
Pyro: Alright since we finally managed to do something right for once we're going to start with Spike!   
Sakura: I MISS YUGI!!!! Crash: Well we voted him off.   
Sakura: *snfle snifle*   
Pyro: Too bad, we're starting! Set the clock for 2.50! Good now go!   
Erin: Where did the Village People come from?  
Spike: The Village People?  
Erica: The Village People.  
Spike: Where did the Village People come from?  
Zero: I know where the Village People got thier idea!   
Pyro: Where? *spread's napalm on toast and eats it*   
Zero: From watching GI Joes!   
Yami Yugi: YO GOE!  
Zero: You watch GI Joe's?  
Sakura: IT'S A CONSPIRACEY I TELL YOU!  
Pyro: DO you even know what a conspiracy is?  
Sakura: Ummm...no?  
Aurora: WE'RE NOT GONNA EXPLAIN IT, WE WANNA GET OUT OF HERE SO SPIKE WHAT IS YOUR FINAL ANSWER?   
Spike: I thought we were on the Weakest Link?  
Crash: WE ARE! JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!   
Spike: Ummm.. The Village people are dudes who watched to much GI Joes and decided to try and be them!   
Erin: I think that's the first correct answer we've had! *  
Yami Yugi: I always wanted to one of the Gay Nordic Norweigen hairless chest Twins.*sigh*  
Everyone: ^_^;;;;  
Erica: No there were a couple more correct ones.   
Crash: Whatever. Kero.  
Kero: Huh? WHERE AM I?????  
Pyro: We don't know or care.   
Erica: Which brand is better, Coke or Pepsi?  
Kero: Mellow Yellow?  
Erin: That wasn't even one of the choices!   
Kero: Huh? LONDON BRIDGES FALLING DOWN FALLING DOWN FALLING DOW LONDON BRIDGES FALLING DOWN MY FAIR OWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What was that for?  
Ryoko: You were bugging me.   
Erica: Moveing on...Sakura.  
Sakura: *snifle snifle* Yes?  
Erin: What is this? *holds up a toaster*   
Sakura: A microwave oven?  
Erica: NO.  
Sakura: Yes it is! Look at it! A door, and an oven rack!   
Goku: NO it's not, look it's a toaster.   
Vegeta: My my Kakarott you really have been studying haven't you? But apparantly it hasn't been enough, it's a microwave oven!   
Kizuna: Meow Meow meow meow!(lay off! It'sa toaster.)  
Spike: Oven!   
Zero: Toaster!   
Ryoko: Oven! Yami Yugi: Toaster!   
S, V, S, R: OVEN!   
Erin: UH guys?^_^;  
G, K, Z, YY: TOASTER!   
Erica: PEOPLE!  
S, V, S, R: OVEN  
Pyro:YO! People listen up!   
G, K, Z, YY: TOASTER!   
S, V, S, R: OVEN  
G, K, Z, YY: TOASTER!   
S, V, S, R: OVEN  
Aurora: SHUT UP! THE DIRECTORS GONNA COME AND GET US!!!!  
*SILENCE*  
Erin: The correct answer is toaster.  
Erica: Thanks to you baka's we only have like 1.33 left!   
Aurora: SO WHAT? Producer: GET ON WITH IT!!!  
Crash: Zero, who is MR.-I Have-A-Snake-For-A-Head's trusty sidekick?  
Zero: Uh....Sergent Ass Crask?  
Pyro: INCORRECT!!!*link-0*   
Aurora: The correct answer is Mr. British Really Really Really Big Metal Crotch Boy. We also would have accepted Saint Dredlocks.  
Erin: Yami Yugi, where is the Loch Ness monster really found?  
Yami Yugi: UHhhh.. Loch Ness Scotland.  
Erica: THAT IS INCORRECT!!!   
Crash: The correct answer is the Alcohol Anamous self help program. He 'helps' people with their drinking problems.   
Loch Ness Monster: *ROAR!!!!!!!*  
Sakura: AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! HELP HE'S AFTER ME!  
LNM: *lotsa roaring noises*(translates to) SAKURA! YOU DIDN'T COME TO SESSIONS THIS WEEK! WHERE WERE YOU???  
Sakura: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Everyone: Uhhh....^_^;;;  
LNM: *more roaring noises* YOU'RE COMEING WITH ME!*scoops Sakura up and flys away with her.*   
Pyro: Jesus how much longer is this gonna go on?  
Erica: Whatever.   
Erin: Spike, what do you get if you mix sugar, spice, and everything nice , then accidently pour some Chemical X onto it all?   
Spike: Uhhh...All my Children!   
Aurora: Nooooooooooooooo...you get the Powder Puff Girls! *link-0*  
PPG's: WE RESENT THAT!!!   
Vegeta: OH shut up!   
PPG's: YOU!   
Vegeta: YOU!   
PPG's: YOU!   
Vegeta: YOU!   
PPG's: YOU!   
Pyro: THAT'S ENOUGH ALL OF YOU!!!   
Aurora: You three, ya you, come here, littel closer just a little more...GET THE HELL OUT OF MY STUDIO!!!!!!!!  
Bubbles: You don't have to yell....  
Erica: YES WE DO!   
PPG's:*cringe, then leave the studio*  
Pyro: There. Kero, where exactly are we?   
Kero: Where are we?   
Aurora: Yes, where the Hell are we eactly?   
Kero: Huh? WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE????? WHERE AM I???  
Erin: Technically that is correct. *link-100*  
Erica: Jesus tap danceing Christ  
Spike: MY SOAPS!!!!   
Crash: No kidding do you ever even use soap?  
Spike: NOOOOOOOO!!!!! I'M MISSING MY SOAPS!!!!   
Aurora: Actually that is correct. *link-200* This is getting creepy, they're actually getting answer's right.   
Pyro: I know. Vegeta what is this*holds up a blow torch*   
Vegeta: BANK!!! It's a blow torch numnuts.  
Pyro: That is correct. And as an extra bonous you get this!* lights huim on fire.*Hmmmmmm...Velvet and plastic melt realy nice...  
Vegeta: AHHHHH!!! AAHHHHH!!!! AHHHHHH!!! *runs around in circles trying to put himself out,a nd only enflames himself further*AHHHHHHH!!!!! MY DRESS!!!   
Aurora: Vegeta! Stop it! I can't puit you out if you keep running around like that huny-bunchkins! *runs around after him*  
PPG's: OH and this's from us! *They freeze him into an ice pop.*  
All: *laugh hysterically* AH HAH HAH HAH HA! YOU GOT FORZEN!!!!  
*THE DUM DUM DU DUMN MUSIC PLAYS*   
A, E, E, C, AND P: YAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!! NOW WE CAN GO HOME!!!!!   
Producer: NOt so fast! You have a gameshow to finish!   
A, E, E, C, and P: AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Erica: Alright then VOTE!!!   
Goku: Zero  
Vegeta: Zero  
Spike: Zero  
Kero: Huh? WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE!!!????? Oh...I'm...O.o....well then Zero.  
Yami Yugi: Zero  
Kizuna: Meow(Zero)  
Zero: IT'S A CONSPIRACY!!!! EVERYONE'S AGAINST ME!!!! GOKU!!!!  
Erin: Well, with an overwelming vote for Zero, I say good bye to you!   
Aurora: NOW GET OUT BEFORE YOU ANGER ME EVEN MORE!!!!   
Zero: AHHHHH!!!!IT'S A COMNSPIRACY!!!!!!! GET AWAY! WHAT ARE YOU--AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!*The manager's guards have come and are escorting him out to where the Tiger's with blocks of led...for stoneing*  
Erica: Tune in next week, or whenever it is that I actually get time to write the next chapter! NOW GET OUT BEFORE I KICK ALL A YOUR ASSES!!!!   
  
*well, you heard her. GET OUT! but TUNE IN FOR NEXT THE NEXT CHAPTER OF SHARPSHOOTER'S ANIME MISCELLANOUS WEAKEST LINK!!!!!*  
  
disclaimer- i don't own any of these people...ya ya ya, blah blah blah. o and i want to give a special thanks to my friend Frost Fox-Wolf and Mistress Avalon for all the inspiration and idea's you either gave me or caused me to have, as dangerous as that is. 


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